Oh Charlie, dear Charlie, you’ve done it again,
Halfway to quitting, halfway to when.
You strut with conviction, then wobble in place,
A master of quitting—at a snail’s pace.

Your mayoral dreams, truly a masterpiece,
Giving up on that? Oh, what a release!
Tried it twice, both times went so swell,
Your quitting deserves a standing farewell.

Incompetent Charlie, you bungle with flair,
You’re almost not running, but still sort of there.
The people all whisper, “Won’t he, or will he?”
We’re riveted, Charlie … well, we’re not, really.

Follow through, old chum, show us your might,
Quit like a pro—fade into the night.
But wait, you’re not done, you’re nearly half-there!
Quitting the quitting takes more than a dare.

Oh Charlie, the master of middling and doubt,
Do us a favor and bow your way out.
Half-measures suit you, it’s all that you do,
So quit quitting halfway—it’s so very you.